I'm learning a new lesson

Twice a month I go to a mom's/women's/Bible study group. It is total chaos with all of our kids running around...there are plenty of interruptions. But God is ever faithful to show up and meet us, speak to us, love on us, etc. I thoroughly enjoy going, and LOVE the women in this group.

To the left is the book we are going through. We are almost finished with it...but have I read ANY of it? Nope. Not until yesterday. :) I finally read one of the chapters, as suggested by my fellow followers of Jesus at our last meeting.

You see, I have had a root of bitterness tucked away in my heart for some time now. And it has festered into a full-blown weed of bitterness, entangling my heart and mind from giving this issue over to the Lord. It's finally catching up with me, and it's to the point where I HAVE to do something about it or else I'm going to suffocate from the bitterness and unforgiveness in my heart.

Let me tell you...I have absolutely walked through situations in my life where I have had to do some MAJOR forgiving. It's NEVER fun. It's counter-cultural. It's radical. It's what Jesus calls us to, because He knows its best for us. Unforgiveness separates us from God.

So...as I'm struggling to find my way through this, I am finding out how invaluable my friendships are. I mean, I already KNOW that, but its times like these that I'm reminded of what incredible women God has placed in my life. As I unraveled at our last group, my friends prayed for me, and suggested re-reading (or in my case, reading for the 1st time!) the chapter on called "Rooting out Bitterness". Also, one of my VERY dearest friends, Julie, brought me a devotional that she just got through doing. She had some unforgiveness in her heart too, and felt as though she was TRULY able to work through that with the Lord through this devotional. What I love is that my friends did not "pick up" my offenses, but rather pointed me to Jesus. Did they empathize? Absolutely. (Julie cried!) But they did not allow the sin in my heart to go deeper by gossiping with me, telling me how right I am, etc. They simply pointed me to Jesus.

Speaking of "picking up offenses", anyone remember The Parable of Dennis? You MUST click on it to go back and read it! Not only will you get a clear picture of this lesson, you will get a HUGE laugh out of these pictures!!!

Anyhow, I have read the chapter on Rooting out Bitterness. And here's the big lesson I'm learning that quite honestly stings a bit. Ok, it stings a lot. The lesson is that we are not only called to FORGIVE, but we are called to BLESS those who have hurt us! (OUCH!) Here's what the book has to say about this...

"When we pray the Lord's Prayer and ask God to 'forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who tresspass against us', this is basically what we are praying. We are asking God to forgive others the way WE want Him to forgive US - covering our sin, prospering and blessing us as if we'd done nothing wrong. We ask for His mercy toward those who have wronged us because we so desperately need His mercy ourselves."

"When we're hurt, the last thing we want to do is bless the one who hurt us. Yet the Bible tells us over and over that this is a part of our calling as Christians. 'Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult, but with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing.' 1 Peter 3:9"

So after I read this chapter, I was praying for BLESSING upon those who have hurt me. But then in the back of my mind, I was like, "And Lord, have your vengeance because I know it hurts you to see me hurt!" Talk about a bitter root! Hey, maybe its a first step to give the vengeance to God instead of trying to take it on myself!! But it was QUITE clear after that quick prayer that there is some MAJOR work to be done in my heart.

So next up I will be doing the devotional that Julie gave me. And I'm also meeting with one of our pastors on Thursday. I'm ALL ABOUT getting counsel! I was telling my "action plan" to Julie yesterday at church, and then I said, "So hopefully by the end of this week I'll have this sorted out." I felt an instant conviction after I said that, and was thinking about it again this morning. I have NO right to put ANY kind of time limit on the work God wants to do. I want to do it God's way, and His timing is not my own...so I will let the Lord do whatever it is He needs to do in what ever timing He chooses so that its done RIGHT. I will just submit to Him. And often times we have to walk in forgiveness on a daily, hourly, minute-by-minute basis, don't we?! When those unpleasant memories creep back in, we have to re-submit them to the Lord however often that may be!

This is my favorite quote from the book...

"How I know I have forgiven someone is that he or she has harmless passage in my mind."

That is beautiful.